Lions and Tigers and Bears .. oh my

School starting again. I am going to be teaching three English 92 courses in New Iberia. This will make it fun when I go to New York in November, but oh well. Mother and Dad are trying to sell their house. They may have a buyer, which means they will be leaving here in the “Chateau” next to my grandparents house and me. Going to be some fun down by the bayou.

I have starting working on my thesis again, in an attempt to graduate.

Saturday:
Last night, I went to a concert and watched three bands: System of a Down, Bad Acid Trip, and The Mars Volta. System of a Down put on a hell of a show. The audience loved them, and they played for over 2 hours. The Mars Volta was phenomenal. They are extremely talented musicians. They played 4 songs, which lasted in total nearly 1 hour. They moved from one song to the next with such ease and the jam sessions were wonderful. They remind me of the Doors with their ability to follow each other. At least their singer doesnt take the spotlight all the time. They actually share the stage really well. Bad Acid Trip was exactly what can be expected from a band called Bad Acid Trip. They were a heavy punk band: the singer sang in exagerated tones (such as the death metal rasp or a high pitch screech) and the musicians played their instruments as loud and as fast as they could. They were talented, but I couldnt make out a single word of what they were trying to say, even when they were just talking to the crowd. The Mars Volta was the highlight of the show for me. I kind of got tired of System of a Down about 1/2 way through, which doesnt mean they were good, just I didnt know the songs as well as the rest of the audience, so I got lost a lot of times. Plus, I was too busy keeping the “mosh” pit from running over a 12 year old in the audience. He was there with his older brother, but his brother was not very big and was having trouble keeping the moshers away.

Then we have Sunday. I came in early this morning from Houston and the concert. Took a shower, because I was covered in sweat, went to bed and work up around noon. Watched some movies and played a few games with Amanda. I have been trying to finish one called Resident Evil 4 for a few months now. I gave up after a really bad turn of events in the game. Amanda loves watching me play because the game is a horror title and she loves those. I had been successfully progressing in the game and finally made it to the second disc. (Amanda joked that she didnt know there was a second disc and damnit it had taken long enough to get to it.) Unfortunately, I have gotten to the part were the “super” bad guys appear. Each Resident Evil has pushed the limit of how hard the “super” bad guys were. In the 1st, they were jumping reptile monsters that could slice your head off. In the 2nd game, they were skinless wall/ceiling climbing freaks with long tongues called lickers (though they appeared pretty quickly in the game.) In the 3rd game, one creature chased you throughout the game. (Cant remember RE:Code Named Veronicas “super” creatures. I refused to finish that game. It was such a horrible game.) RE4’s bad guys are super-regenerating hopping around after their arms and legs cut off demon looking greyed deformed humanoid son of a fucking mother fuckers. They fucking suck.

Well, they are so creeping and scary that Amanda actually asked me to stop playing the game. I did, and we were watching some MST3K, when we heard a loud noise outside. Remember we live in the country, so loud noises means we have an animal getting into something. So I turned on all the outside lights and grabbed a flashlight and opened the door to see what was making the noise. As I open the door and look out, I notice a white bag laying in the driveway and suddenly a large black creature runs off behind a tree in the front yard. I thought damnit, fucking dogs getting into the trash. I shined the light following after the black “dog” and when the light hit the tree I noticed something was odd. There were a set of yellow eyes looking back at me. But they werent at the level of a dog. They were 5 feet above the ground and looking back at me. I thought is that a huge racoon that climbed up the tree. Then I realized it wasnt climbing the tree. It was standing up. Oh shit, its a fucking black bear staring back at me.
I knew there were reports of bears being seen in Vermilion parish. Amanda’s younger brother has had bears around his house in Erath, which really is only 15 miles away. I just never thought I would see one this close. When I mean close it was standing about 15 yards from me. (For the ones familiar, it was standing behind the tree that is next to where fritz’s dog house use to be.)
SO, its standing there look at me. Now I was ready to slam the door shut and lock it, but it wasnt acting like it was going to run for me. I waited a few moments and then it must have decided not to chance anything and started to run off back towards the river, right past the storage buildings. I told Amanda to get her gun (first time I ever asked her to get it). She came to the door and we waited for a few moments to see if the bear was coming back or if I could see its eyes in the outlining trees. I decided I had to at least pick up the trash bag and put it back into the trashcan and move the trashcan away from the house. Amanda watched as I walked out to the bag threw it into the can, dragged it about 15 yards from the house and put a huge rock on top of it. I know, the bear will find that funny. I called the sheriff who referred me to the Department of Wildlife and Fisheries, who should come out tomorrow.

So now I have to keep my eye out for bears while I am also looking out for snakes and nutria rats and wolves and wild dogs and spiders and flying insects. God sometimes I love the great outdoors and living in the swamps of Louisiana.

Wilbur

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0 Responses to Lions and Tigers and Bears .. oh my

  1. stryxdomina says:

    it wasn’t a bear. it was the ‘pig man’.

  2. wduluoz says:

    Please elaborate or maybe not, then I wont sleep at all. Wilbur Bears I can handle, massively deformed creatures of unknown origin, hehe. edited: God damnit, stryx. Now I can see faces peeping into the windows. I remembered what you said about grandfather’s stories. Damnit, now Im not going to sleep. edited again: It came back last night, after I went to sleep. It tore up the trash and drug most of it off into the swamp.

  3. mayfly says:

    no… it’s the “super ” bad guy for resident evil 5! you’re participating in the beta testing… IRL!!!! seriously though, that sounds like a helluva bar. (“e” left out on purpose. when reading the previous sentence, imagine the word “bear” pronounced incorrectly, as in, “what you doin’ with that gun, jethro?” “i’mmunna go git me a bar.”) what’s wild life and fisheries going to do with him?

  4. girlbean says:

    Yipe. Don’t get yerself eaten thar. I kept having weird dreams after seeing the new Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. I don’t want to imagine what you dreamed about.

  5. arglor says:

    GOOd fucking god… its been a while since i’ve heard that shit… and fuck all you people who used to use that shit to scare me to death… i remember one night when you jack asses kept telling me about the pigman and making it so i couldn’t even use the restroom when i needed to pee……….. i hate you guys sometimes… *glares at stryx, wduluoz, (figures not represented like T—- , M—, R—, and E—)*

  6. dramke says:

    the bear loves wdulouz and amanda. he has decided they have GOOD garbage. came back the next night and who knows maybe watched wdoulouz pick up his mess…..just wait til Fred get there. he’ll get that bear.

  7. wduluoz says:

    yep he came back again. This time though there was only the garbage he refused the eat last time: plastic, paper, styrofoam. I had set up a noise maker, but that didnt phase him. Is it inhuman to think about wrapping an electric fence around the garbage? I mean it wont kill him but it might convince him to eat the rabbits instead. The wildlife and fisheries said they are going to put a live capture cage up on the property. To many reports and he has become a regular here, so tomorrow they are going to set it up. They asked me if I had a problem with setting it up and I said, “No sir, no problem at all.” Last thing I want is a constant unpredictable visitor where I have to worry about getting out of my car every night. Wilbur

  8. wduluoz says:

    last night the bear avoided the strategically positioned traps and walked across the street to get into a neighbor’s trash and then to thank them marked their door with two muddy pawprints. got to love him. and david for some reason wants me to take a photo of this bear.

  9. wduluoz says:

    well, got home to the neighbor’s dogs barking and hollering, thought damn the bear must be over in their yard. Shit. Its never going to be captured. As I was looking around, I noticed that the trap next to the house didnt seem to have the same amount of food in it. Then I noticed the eyes. Now I realize it was in a cage and I realize this is a pretty damn secure cage, but it was 3 feet away from me. Then I guess it realized I was scared and jumped at the mesh. I ran into the house, called the wildlife and fisheries agent and realizing I just woke him up, apologized and stated I would see him in the morning. Snuck out and took a few really shitty pictures for david. (its in a cage and its dark.) Now I am sitting here listening to it cry like a baby. Damnit Im going to bed.

  10. mealymel says:

    wow. some wildlife you got there. i was wondering if you were still alive… glad to hear that you are, although I wouldn’t suggest you and Amanda take any romantic late night walks anytime soon.

  11. horselover_fat says:

    pixplzthx.

  12. dramke says:

    He forgot to mention the ending. The next day they came to get the bear. Spent the entire day at his place working on the bear. Tranquilizing,etc. I was not there, so can not write the specifics. Then they took the bear away…….Well, that was what we thought. The next day, I went riding down to Bancker to see what was going on. We had passed another bear cage heading back that way. When we got there, several people were milling about with dogs and even on four wheelers. We pulled off on my land and called a person over to ask them what they were doing. The man said ” we are turning a bear loose”. I exclaimed, “Turning him loose! We were the ones who called you to pick him up!” The man then informs us that they have chased him with the dogs, shot in the air, chased him with the four wheelers, and hollered. He said, “We chased him all the way to Live Oak.” That is only a mile down the road. Now we are suppose to be comforted that this bear will never want to come back to our land. They do have a collar on his neck to track him, but it is hard to believe that he would not want to return to eat at wd’s “little restaurant.” Think about it…a lot of you love to go to wd’s and eat.