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As I sing,
“There is no you, there is only me
there is no you, there is only me
there is no fucking you, there is only me
only, only, only, only, only”

and

“Why do you get all the love in the world
why do you get all the love in the world
why do you get all the love in the world
all the love in the world all the love in the world”

and

“Fade away fade away fade away fade away
My world is getting smaller everyday ay ay ay and that’s ok
My world is getting smaller everyday ay ay ay and that’s ok
My world is getting smaller everyday ay ay ay and that’s ok
My world is getting smaller everyday ay ay ay and that’s ok”

“There’s somebody on top of me
I don’t know I don’t know
Isn’t anyone stopping me?
I don’t know I don’t know
I won’t try and hold my breath
I don’t know I don’t know
Just how far down can I go
I don’t know I don’t know I don’t know”

and

“And I am still inside you.
And I am still inside you.”

and

“and on, and on, and on, and on, and on, . . . .”

You make me sing crappy lyrics that go along with catchy nearly wonderful tunes.

Wilbur

He has become the new Leonard Cohen. When in doubt, dont sing the words just speak them.
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As I am working at the Hilton tonight, ULL English department is hosting the British Writers Conference. Dr Christine Devine walked up didnt recognize or didnt want to recognize me. She asked for help, and I was able to help help. Yet, even after I was recognized by another whose name escapes me (please forgive me I am dumb when it comes to names), she still did not even hint that I was a familiar face. Then, Dr Jerry Mcguire walked through the lobby and I waved and said “Goodday Dr Mcquire.” Nothing, he quickly looked the other way and walked away.

I am the exiled, the refused, the unmentionable.

At this moment, I do not want anything to do with ULL. Hopefully, I will change my opinion by tomorrow, so I can finish.

Wilbur

Since I am working at the Hilton and teaching at the community college along with trying to complete my Master’s room, I am usually too sleepy to do anything. I decided after much pushing and pulling from friends and family to spend time with them.

Last weekend, Phil and Melissa came over, and I cooked crawfish etoufe. It was a wonderful evening. We talked late into the night and I believe Phil did not want to leave. Melissa, unfortunately, was falling asleep from the large dinner.

This Friday night, Ronnie, David and I went to see Sin City. My expectations were low, so I was thoroughly suprised by the good acting, even though the dialogue was a little weak. I enjoyed spending time with both Ronnie and David.
Ronnie is trying to get back into school. I hope he does. Its been a long time and he needs to elevate himself.

On Saturday, Dad, mom, Amanda and I went to Richard’s for boiled crawfish. It was nice spending time with them. When I finally do move, it will be hard.

God this is starting to sound elementary. Dick likes Jane. Bob ran home.

It has been a long time since I have enjoyed the weekends. Hopefully, this wont be the last.

Wilbur

I remember sitting out, in anticipation, the day before the show, Episode One. I was proud of myself for starting the line and only doing it one day before, hehe. I read a few books of Vonnegut until a few more started to arrive. We had lively discussions about how we remember the movies and how we were excited by the chance to see new ones. It was a fabulous time. More people came and soon it was a tailgate party for the big show. People brought food and radios. Some brought televisions. It was exciting. Before the age of ticketmaster.com, I had sat out for concert tickets discussing with the fellow fans how much we hoped the performance would be fantastic and envigorating. There was the same air of excitment for the new Star Wars movies.

So I camped out for about 10 hours, until I had to go to work(Night Audit). Friends of mine took my place, and the following morning I arrived and a massive line had formed. It was exciting. I joined my friends in line again. The local radio stations had sent their vehicles to interview and generally become a part of the excitment.

The ticket booths opened up and we got our tickets. Filled with excitement, we purchased tickets for two showings, 12:00AM and 2:00AM. I had been up for nearly 36 hours when they finally started the trailers for the movie. David, Ronnie, Bob and me were hungered down to watch the movie. We shouted out when the yellow text rolled up the screen. Then we listened to dialogue for 45 minutes. No problem, we were still living off the excitment for the day. The fabulous pod racing scene stirred us, so we would be awake for the final fight.
When it was over, we felt a rush of adrenaline. As we ran to the other theatre to see the next showing, we discussed the good points ignoring the bad dialogue and Jar Jar. The yellow text rolled out for the second showing, but we didnt shout. We were still excited, but we were discussing the movie to ourselves. Trying to convince ourselves that it was a great movie, not just a decent movie. Then it happened, the bastard dialogue knocked us out. I, myself, fought to stay awake. I would not fall asleep during star wars. How could I think of doing such a thing.

I slightly woke up later during pod race. Like when your mother tells you to get up and you barely open your eyes enough to say “No”. But it was fleeting. I remember the fight scene at the end barely only because I realized it was nearly over, and we needed to leave. I actually started getting up during the fight scene. I thought, ” Fuck the movie I need a bed.” This is the moment I realized the movie was not great, and it was only decent because of my love for Star Wars.

Well less than two months from now two artistic endeavors I have been in love with for more years than I care to think about are renewing themselves. Episode III is finally going to be in theatres, and Trent Reznor has emerged from his hole in the ground with a new album.

I love Star Wars (not GL, but SW) and I deeply respect Trent Reznor and his motely of friends who help him produce albums under the name, Nine Inch Nails. But as the years go by, I realize that my love and respect has grown disproportionally to the talent behind both Star Wars and NiN. I dont think May is going to be a good month.

I think based on Episode one and two that EIII will suck ass in all regards. I think Trent Reznor going back to writing what he calls “songs” as opposed to “pieces” will undoubtably be disappointing. Trent can I tell you lyrically you are hit and miss. “Bite the hand that feeds” is not only a weak title and lyric but it is cliche’d. Why the hell did you think you needed to say it so many times in one song? Oh wait you dont just say it in that one song, great.
If you, the reader, dont like the titles of the songs on NiN, then I warn you. You might want to ignore the lyrics. God I cant wait for the instrumental remix versions. But I am trying to look on the bright side. It is SW and it is NiN.

Damn you youth.

Wilbur

Original Website.

Laughing my ass off, inside joke to Arglor.

As the pro-life and christian groups fight to save one life, Terry Schiavo, they ignore the hundred (maybe thousands) who are dying due to lack of health care insurance and major cutbacks in Medicaid.

As Fred Grimm notes, their heroic crusade for the disabled was limited to a single person.

Meanwhile, The Herald’s Carol Marbin Miller reports that at least four disabled Floridians under the receding care of the state Medicaid program have died in recent months in circumstances tinged by neglect.

These were people whose disabilities required considerable care looked after by an agency that has figured how to save millions lately by increasing the caseload of care-givers.

Very Interesting Read:
A federally funded watchdog group is investigating the recent deaths of four disabled Floridians amid an aggressive state campaign to cut millions of dollars from programs that provide medical care for disabled people in community settings.

So where is their concern for these lost souls? Where is their protests for these abandoned lives? Why are they not concerned for the ones dieing because of cutbacks?

The answer lies in money. They are concerned with you as long as you have money and are white. If you are poor, you will be ignored. If you are black, not only will you be ignored, but also you will be looked down upon, when they do pay attention to you.

“You’re not your job. You’re not how much money you have in the bank. You’re not the car you drive. You’re not the contents of your wallet. You’re not your fucking khakis. You’re the all-singing, all-dancing crap of the world.”
Tyler Durden

Unfortunately, he was naively mistaken. You are these things because we live in a society and the society sets the norms and they believe you are these things.

Wilbur

It is that time again. Last year, I was living in the house on St Thomas with David and Amanda. I enjoyed that year, even with the bitter cold floors and drafts. I snuck out early that morning and grabbed chocolate and sugared easter candies for both of them because I had missed waking up in the morning to the surprises left by the easter bunny.

So commence the fertility ritual and the rites of spring. (Ill be hiding as usual.)

Ok back to present. With the events in Florida panning out and hopefully coming to an end, let us reflect on the Congressional leaders who felt it urgent to step into a private matter.
Roll Call on S 686

Sometimes I love people:
“Things are all done in God’s timing,” said David Vogel, a 47-year-old Steubenville, Ohio, musician who was arrested for trespassing last week when he tried to enter the hospice to take water to Terri Schiavo. “Does He have his hand upon this? Oh, yeah. The parallels are there with what happened to Jesus Christ. He was condemned to death, an innocent man. She’s an innocent woman[*].”
*Who has been in a persistant vegetative state for 15 years. She died a long time ago.

My only concern is dont the people protesting have more important things to do with their lives? Maybe getting together and putting their energies in getting children adopted or feeding, clothing and housing the poor.

And Bush one quick question:
“The president is saddened by the latest ruling. When there is a complex case such as this, where serious questions and doubts have been raised, the president believes we ought to err on the side of life,” said a White House spokeswoman, Dana Perino.
Err on Side of Life — What happened in Iraq?

Oh I kid. These assholes will one day wake up and realize their lives have been for naught. Hopefully they wont be on a feeding tube.

Wilbur

Well I am starting to feel better. I have energy again. I hate being sick. It makes me feel old. Aching, sore, snot dribbling out of my nose, throat filled with mucus. Lovely.

Amanda came home today to a bee attack. After she slammed the door yelling about bees, she informed me that a snake was hanging on the screendoor. I decided to go take a look and sure enough a smallish only 8-10 inch long snake had curled crawled up to the handle and was enjoying the view. I got a poker and a longish stick and attempted to take it off as I noticed it was shaking its tail as though to shake a rattle. It didnt have a rattle so I laughed at it saying “oh trying to frighten me by pretending to be a rattler” Well I got it pissed and finally with much effort flattened it head into the pavement. Proud that I had killed it. I got the remainder of Amanda’s belongings and went inside.
I was curious as to what type of snake I had just vanquished. I looked through the pictures of a non-venomous snakes. I thought damn its not in there, so I looked through the dangerous ones thinking that it couldnt have been one of those because it was too small. Well I was wrong. In fact it was not pretending to be a rattler, it was a rattler, a Pygmy Rattler. Needless to say, I have now bought more mothballs in an attempt to stink them away. I hope he didnt have any family in the area.

Wilbur

My point which I didnt get to because I was too agravated with work and being sick is this. Quizzes and surveys are set up to be biased from the beginning. What is sad is when the quizzes are portrayed as categorization tools for people. I trully feel people take these tests get the results and think, Sure I think I am a Facist. What is a facist, democrat or anarchist? Names we apply to people and groups to define them. We assume that the definition is rigid and that we should fit as well as possible the category to be accepted by someone. Politics and life are changing and evolving (hopfully). Your views should change and should not be stedfast.

Unfortunately, we(the ones who read my posts) do not take these surveys as being serious and we do make fun of them, but there are people out there that feel the need to categorize themselves. This allows them become a part of a larger(“grander”) scheme of things. If the last election should have taught us anything, it should be that people want to be part of a movement for good or bad. People became highly divided by the “slight” differences in the two parties.

I had a class pointing out the differences and similarities between the two candidates. Guess what we came up with more similarities. Unfortunately for me, it proved to them that it was as fruitless endeaver to pick one who was better than the other.

Damnit I want discussion and argument. I want people to care about what is happening around them. I want them to question the leaders that they now adore and accept. Neither dominant party is acceptable in my eyes any more. They should be eliminated.

Wilbur

PS — to the Senators and Congressmen who are right now stepping boadly into a private matter to prove how big their penises are “FUCK YOU”. I swear I will do anything in my feeble power to make sure everyone I know and meet knows who you are and what you think of their private lives. You have crossed the line into an area you do not understand and are only hoping to get your name into the spotlight. Well I hope to whatever pathetic thing you call a god that it backfires and ruins your chances in politics. Its strange when the family who started the battle warns the people supposedly fighting on their side to backoff.

Oh and DeLay, I hope you get a chance to run for president. I would like to see your skeletons come out, front stage.

Thank you:
Jim Davis, Debbie Wasserman Schultz and Robert Wexler, denounced the Schiavo bill as overstepping congressional authority.

Hamden Baskin III, one of Michael Schiavo’s lawyers, condemned the proposed federal legislation as “blatantly unconstitutional” and predicted a federal judge would rule it so, and refuse to order the tube’s re-insertion.

Anyone who opposes this should be protesting now. This is a chrisis ready to explode. Our privacy has been stripped. These members holding meetings on Sunday want to become “gods”.

Elected officials that do not agree with these few lawmakers. Please get your fucking asses back to your jobs. We voted for you for a reason. Dont give up.

The U.S. Senate, meanwhile, won agreement on the legislation from Democrats, who didn’t even show up Sunday for the voice vote that took less than two minutes.